Voradors space

I can see it everywhere I go. It seems so close it looks like a land far off in the distance but i cant be sure. I cant be sure of anything but I know what my faith tells me. It tells me that it isnt a land at all. It tells me it is a kingdom and on it there is a thorn upon which sits a magnificant queen. Its her kingdom and im just another knight. Her kingdom is under seige by a betrayer. I dont know whether I can prevail aginst it but i know that she will survive that i will make sure of. My queen I am forever your servent.

 

ps yes its happy sue me

A weeping willow it is very strong and can withstand the fiercest storm. Yet it looks so gentle. You take cover from it and for a while it gives you protection but eventually the storm will tire it out. It will begin to tire of you languishing underneath it and bend to withdraw its protection. What else is there to do but to step out and bare the feirce storm all your own. You can sit and watch the tree and when it begins to fall you can try and fix it. How can a man fix something so incredible? He cannot he can simply move and allow the tree to fix itself.

 

ps Yes i know more personal ones dear lord they must bore you all but lets see if you figure out what I am talking about here. That is if you have the Time.

Look at the stars they are a natural beauty and a wonder. The magic that can take hold of you looking at one is intense. You reach for them but you know you can never reach them. Take a closer look.

Stars are balls of flame if you reach for one you reach for your destruction and the closer you get the closer you get to anhialation. Stay away from the stars stay in the shadows. Stars are pretty little executioners.

"I am too busy" I dont have the time

"..." I dont have the time for you

"Lets just be friends" I have better things to do with my time than you

"Lets talk about this later." I dont have the time to talk about this with you now

"Itll be alright" Maybe time will fix you

"My name is Paul" All i have is time.

 

No one has time anymore it seems to be spent in the mirror.

day 1,

         At last me and her are together. This is one of the happiest moments in my life I finally feel complete. All my friends are happy for me too. It feels good to be me. We sat today talking in her living room it was nice we just talked and listened to music. Unfortuanatly she had to take a shower and get changed to go to her friends house. Oh yeah and my "friend" keeps tellin me shes going out with some other guy. Some peoples jealousy get the better of them i swear.

 

day 3,

         Her compassion is never ending she knew what my "friend" was saying about her but yet she forgives my "friend" she says its understandable. The woman is more than a human can comprehend. However my "friend" is not. I was on the phone to her today but she was going out to dinner with her family or something. My "friend" said she was going out with some other guy. God some people are so desgustingly simple.

 

day 5,

         One such as Her is not a human She is something else something better. She kissed me today and it was beautiful. I have cut ties with that "friend" of mine. Damn my jealous "friends" they can burn in hell of all them I dont need them anymore. I dont need anything just Her.

 

day 96,

         How long has it been since i have seen this thing. The last entry was 91 days ago but that was not me writing . I have lost everything to my blindness to my own stupidity. I have turned all my friends away when they were just trying to help me. I didn't understand the things she was trying to tell me I latched on to what I wanted to hear and blocked out the rest. I will never again feel that way about someone and I will never again have any friends to hurt. Perhaps its for the best loneliness will protect everyone I realise I care about. Solitude is the price for my isolent stupidty and now it must be paid.

 

Factual or fictional you know me you decide.  

"No one loves you more than me, by the time you get to read this ill probably be dead. When you left in 87 a part of me went to heavan. I thank god at least I got to know what love really was but it hurt to see what true love really does. Even though we never made love you were all that there was it was because I loved you so much I had to make you leave then I slipped up and let you get close to me. This was not the way I thought this life was supposed to be. Baby dont you see I had a blood transfusion that left me with HIV. I died in 1993 I died a virgin I wish I could have given myself to you I cired in the hospital because there was no one else but you.

Promise you'll meet me in paradise no matter what.

Ill keep you love forever with me"

 

This is from a song by Immortal Technique called You Never know. Prehaps it will make you think about rap or prehaps it will just make you think. Either way this is greater than anything I could have ever done and the scary thing is. Its true

 

 

She sat resting, fighting the disease vying for control of her body .Her red sheets were her armour against the disease. She was so tired and the real world was so creul so vile without the sickness that now was spreading throughout her veins. However she was all on her own here in her own little paradise. Her red sheets were her armour against the real world. Love, she loved people which should be good but she loved two and couldn't choose between them. This was the ultimate wound and the dilemma that would never be solved. However she didn't worry not here because they didn't exsist here. The red sheets were her armour against the dilemma.

 

However the sheets felt odd, slimey almost. They were her protection but they just didn't feel comfortable. Then again armour doesnt always feel good but this was really irratating and made it difficult for her to sleep. Thankfully a sudden rush of fatigue sent her to blissful oblivion.

 

                                               Her red sheets... Used to be white